How did you know someone was interested in you?

How did you let other people know you were interested in them?

What is your definition of virginity?

What is a normal date for you?

What defined a relationship?

How did people respond to those that didn’t follow dating norms?

How closely did you follow dating norms?

Explain a typical hookup

How did you meet people whom you dated?

When did you tell your parents you were dating?

Did you ask the other person out, or vice versa?

Where/when did you first learn about sex?

Did you take sex ed, and if so, what do you remember?


After conducting two interviews from males of two different generations, I was able to find many similarities and differences between the two.  Some of which surprised me, others I expected based on past knowledge.  Since virginity and LBGTQ were some of the larger topics I chose to focus on those subjects, however I also asked much broader questions based on norms.

The first person I interviewed was a male from generation x who is a great representation of his generation, as he followed the dating norms quite closely.  The way he described dating back then was very private.  This came up after I asked him how the community viewed people who broke dating norms.  He said where he was from, they wouldn’t be treated differently, and that was mainly because people didn’t flaunt their sexuality.  This I determined was the main difference between today’s digital age, and generation x.  For millennial’s, you weren’t even dating until everybody knew that you were through relationship status updates, and pictures.  Not only relationships being legitimized over the internet, one of the ways you could tell a girl was into you was by a poke, or a like on a picture on social media.  The other main difference I found are the types of dates that are prevalent between the two generations.  In speaking with my 21 year old friend, he described this generation as the “Netflix and Chill” generation of dating.  This refers to dates where watching Netflix would be considered a date.  In talking with my first interviewee, he said most of his dates were mainly active, such as going hiking, or golfing.

I found many of the similarities in the courtship aspect.  The guy picking up the check on the first date, then splicing it was common in both interviews.  The other similarity was in their perception of virginity.  Both of them defined virginity as intercourse.  Despite their not being a “working definition for virginity”(20), this has seemed to be the definition that has been accepted throughout the ages.


Valenti, J. (2009). The purity myth: How America’s obsession with virginity is hurting young women. Berkeley, CA: Seal Press.